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Humor Quotes

If people never did silly things nothing intelligent would ever get done.
Ludwig Wittgenstein
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Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
Edward de Bono
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I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones.
John Cage
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When people are laughing, they're generally not killing each other.
Alan Alda
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You grow up the day you have your first real laugh at yourself.
Ethel Barrymore
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Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keep friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and contentment.
Greenville Kleisser
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I like nonsense. It wakes up the brain cells.
Dr. Seuss
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Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquillity.
James Thurber
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My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world.
George Bernard Shaw
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I have always noticed that people will never laugh at anything that is not based on truth.
Will Rogers
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Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke
Will Rogers
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Laughter rises out of tragedy, when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.
Erma Bombeck
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Between levity and cheerfulness there is a wide distinction; and the mind which is most open to levity is frequently a stranger to cheerfulness.
Hugh Blair
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The beauty of the world has two edges, one of laughter, one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder.
Virginia Woolf
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Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly; devils fall because of their gravity.
G. K. Chesterton
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The Procrastinator's Creed:

1. I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.

2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.

3. I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration.

4. I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion to the amount of bodily injury I could expect to receive from missing them.

5. I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility for new technologies, astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.

6. I truly believe that all deadlines are unreasonable regardless of the amount of time given.

7. I shall never forget that the probability of a miracle, though infinitesmally small, is not exactly zero.

8. If at first I don't succeed, there is always next year.

9. I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.

10. I shall always begin, start, initiate, take the first step, and/or write the first word, when I get around to it.

11. I obey the law of inverse excuses which demands that the greater the task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior to beginning the greater task.

12. I know that the work cycle is not plan/start/finish, but is wait/plan/plan.

13. I will never put off until tomorrow, what I can forget about forever.

14. I will become a member of the ancient Order of Two-Headed Turtles (the Procrastinator's Society) if they ever get it organized.

source unknown - please email me if you know the original author
Unknown
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Humor is a universal language.
Joel Goodman
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Humor is a serious thing. I like to think of it as one of our greatest earliest natural resources, which must be preserved at all cost.
James Thurber
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And we should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.
Friedrich Nietzsche
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The secret source of humour itself is not joy, but sorrow. There is no humour in heaven.
Mark Twain
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